A shadow of the meeting

The Starting Point

Meta Moment

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Shadow stories

Friends: Debra Solomon / Nuno Sacramento

The infinite dualism

Today Roe called me saying that he was not feeling good and he asked me if I would not mind to do the Blue Meetings alone. My first reaction was: “I will be alone… without Roe there is no Blue Meeting!” In this thoughts there are two concepts that I should rethink: ‘being alone’ and ‘presence’.

I grabed my computer and cycled to the Kalvintore. Rituals are for me important and usually they are not just related with a specific time but also with a specific place. I could not write this lines at home. I arrive to my shopping mall and while I was going down in the escalator, I saw for the first time since we start the Blue Meetings our table empty. It was empty of the positive presence [1] of Roe but full of memories of our thoughts and discussions, divagations and jumps. Like a quantum field, it was filled with potentialities. I could call it a negative presence, like if I was looking to the empty contour of Roe’s figure.

I sat down and started writing these lines…

Suddenly, Paul arrived…

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Paul is gone and I felt that this time we didn’t tune at all. Our conversation was made out of misunderstandings, at least from my side. I could hardly understand his words and his discourse didn’t made any sense for me. I did an enormous effort to pay attention to Paul, but I didn't succeeded to understand him. What did happen? I remember the last time I found him very interesting. Why this time I was not connected with him at all?

I believe that there is two different settings that one can take when confronted with the unexpected. The Cartesian and the Radial predisposition. I try always to open myself to the sudden changes that the different realities propose to me. I try to make part of the situation and being a witness and not just an observer. However today the reality changed dramatically two times in a short period of time. First when Roe called me and when Paul arrived to this table. It costs energy to be open and to change your mind set so abruptly.

Now that I’m again alone, I realise how busy I was with my self and the chances that I missed…  
 

[1] In the sense of charge and without a qualitative meaning.